An excerpt of my memoirs which I am currently writing.
Before my transition, in the depths of my greatest misery, in the darkness where there is no light, no hope of future, no escape, only defeat and distress – I dreamed a dream.
“I am an adult and I am in a bedroom with a man, we are getting ready for a party, we can hear our guests downstairs socialising and enjoying the night. I look at the bedroom door just past the modern four poster timber bed and I say to the man “we had better go down stairs, they are waiting for us, please put my necklace on for me”, he gently places the necklace around my neck. “Thank you”, I turn to leave the room and the man stops me, and says “Wait, look in the mirror, you are so beautiful”, I turn to look in the mirror, and there I am, a woman, not just a woman but a beautiful woman wearing a most beautiful necklace that surrounded me in the most beautiful iridescent light I had ever seen”
My eyes opened, I am filled with peace, I am filled with strength. I have seen myself. I have seen my future. I will be fine.
It is 1987 and I am only 15.